It's been such a good week. I feel so lucky today. How fortunate I am to come to the end of the work week and feel this way. There aren't many that do. Mostly I'm tired, but I'm also satisfied. I have plenty of work to do, and while there is some amount of pressure to get it done, it is not uncomfortable or unpleasant.
What is best is that I feel like I have the time and energy to still enjoy my life away from my job, but that my job is also one of the things I want to spend the time and energy enjoying.
I made a point tonight after work to aim for balance between things that needed to be done and those things I wanted to do. But the thing I noticed just like my work week, is that the key to that is to want to do the things that need to get done. I have always been terrible about that. I am a procrastinator and an avoider when it comes to unpleasant tasks. I hate doing the dishes or folding the laundry, but I was determined that tonight was going to be different. I did start by doing something that I feel like I never have time to do during the work week, which I have been longing for over the past days: reading a book in the hammock in the yard. It was so peaceful and refreshing.
A short while later I was walking the dog when in front of me rose a sliver of a crescent moon. It was a crisp, milky shred of a moon hanging between the trees. It was so simple, pure and lovely. I don't know quite what it is about a crescent moon that always makes me realize just how small I am. Perhaps it has something to do with how small and delicate something so large appears. Either way, it only has to take a moment like that to help me feel revitalized, even as I am exhausted.
When I returned, I was able to look at rinsing and drying the dog, doing the dishes and making dinner not as a chore, but as something good that I could do for my family and my household. The task hadn't changed, what had was my frame of mind in thinking about the prospect of doing these things which are normally unpleasant tasks to work my way around or finish as quickly as possible.
I finished my day with a bowl of ice cream, a small bowl; well, tiny really, but a bowl none the less. I had wanted some cookies and cream ice cream, but as I was standing in the freezer section looking at the selection, I remembered other times I had had cookies and cream ice cream when I bought it. I was never quite satisfied with it. It seemed like I was eating gritty vanilla, with only occasional bites and tastes of cookies. I had the idea instead to buy vanilla ice cream and a package of Oreos. Boy, was that a good idea. With about a scoop and a half of ice cream I mixed two crushed Oreos, having used the heal of a knife to crush them gently on the cutting board. I waited until the ice cream had softened a little, and then stirred it up. It was absolutely delicious. Now I know for certain what to do the next time I want cookies and cream ice cream.
I remember being in 6th grade and having an older girl say to me in the bathroom, "Simple minds, simple pleasures." in response to something I had laughed about. She had intended it as an insult even though what I was laughing at wasn't hurting anyone. I remember brushing it off for the most part at the time, but it has stuck with me all these years. What she had intended as something to hurt me at the time has in a way turned into my mantra. There is nothing wrong with keeping a simple mind. It is uncluttered, and unencumbered by the tangles of complications. It makes for rather clear thinking. Simple doesn't have to equal stupid. Also, I have found that some of my happiest times have come from simple pleasures. These pleasures have been particularly steadying to me in times of trial. I still value them most now as they almost always surround people or places that I love, but also that they don't rely on anyone else for me to be happy. In other words:
"Simple minds, simple pleasures." = I make my own happiness.
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